You know those movies in which they show what a pain a kid can be and all the havoc it can wreck... I've (or rather we've) had the misfortune of having to know one, who sadly happens to roam around us from time to time.
The kid, a girl, doesn't seem to be more than 3 and half years of age. And you'd wonder...how can someone so small be so annoying!
First, it (i will not say "she" because of her not resembling anything human!) comes bearing cute toys, broken doll heads and cars, gives you the cute puppy dog eyes and asks, "Can you play with meeeee?" On the surface, the picture is purely angelic, and would make any woman's uterus churn with a longing of having one of their own. You cannot say no to that kid when you look at her cute pink clothes, soft pink cheeks and cute baby voice. Once you say yes, that kid will make you do anything and literally anything.
Her ulterior goal: debasing the adult species.
Sad part, most humans fall victim to her schemes and yield to her demands. But if after a while, the self-respecting human resists, that's when the demon in her is unleashed. She once got her hands on a trolley and asked me to push it and give her a ride on it. Since she looked all cute and insisted, I obliged her with one round. After that, I said i'd to study and tried to excuse myself. That's when she entered my room, found my slippers and threw them from the first floor to the ground floor! Legend has it she has done various meaner and crueler things to others. When I gave her the serious pissed-off look, she seemed just the tiniest bit repentant, and after a few annoyed words thrown at her, went down and got one of my slippers back. She left the other one as it was.
That's when I thought, "Kid, you are the embodiement of your parents misdeeds.
Kid, you are the reason of your mother's sins being forgiven everyday.
Kid, you are the inspiration of how i'll always be on the pill after I get married."
Right now, I see her manipulating another unsuspecting, innocent human. She looks at me, and I mutter under my breath, "Buzz off, kid!"
My mum says I hate kids.
First, it (i will not say "she" because of her not resembling anything human!) comes bearing cute toys, broken doll heads and cars, gives you the cute puppy dog eyes and asks, "Can you play with meeeee?" On the surface, the picture is purely angelic, and would make any woman's uterus churn with a longing of having one of their own. You cannot say no to that kid when you look at her cute pink clothes, soft pink cheeks and cute baby voice. Once you say yes, that kid will make you do anything and literally anything.
Her ulterior goal: debasing the adult species.
Sad part, most humans fall victim to her schemes and yield to her demands. But if after a while, the self-respecting human resists, that's when the demon in her is unleashed. She once got her hands on a trolley and asked me to push it and give her a ride on it. Since she looked all cute and insisted, I obliged her with one round. After that, I said i'd to study and tried to excuse myself. That's when she entered my room, found my slippers and threw them from the first floor to the ground floor! Legend has it she has done various meaner and crueler things to others. When I gave her the serious pissed-off look, she seemed just the tiniest bit repentant, and after a few annoyed words thrown at her, went down and got one of my slippers back. She left the other one as it was.
That's when I thought, "Kid, you are the embodiement of your parents misdeeds.
Kid, you are the reason of your mother's sins being forgiven everyday.
Kid, you are the inspiration of how i'll always be on the pill after I get married."
Right now, I see her manipulating another unsuspecting, innocent human. She looks at me, and I mutter under my breath, "Buzz off, kid!"
My mum says I hate kids.
hahahaha!!!
ReplyDeleteThank heavens I'm not the only one that finds them annoying...they also scare me a little. I'm not sure why, we were all children once, I just don't remember being *that* annoying :)
Oh man! Some kids make you want to tie your tubes.
ReplyDeleteCurrently my three year old cousin is at our place and he is the most angelic kid ever. It actually makes me feel abit sad :( he has the right to be a bit naughty but he is so yielding to rules that it's heart-breaking. And he speaks so politely with 'please' and 'thank you'
touta-
ReplyDeleteI know right! I don't remember having annoyed anyone either. I usually was a collected kid altogether. Don't know whats up with some of them these days.
jnana-
yea, I know what you mean. I have come across those kids too :( I think it's because they're overly disciplined by those around them, or are made scared. And it's these kids who grow to be very different humans in life.