I mean it

"I feel like you're mine.
I love you."

I love the haram. And I love Sayyida (Fatimah al Masoomah (s.a)). It took three years for me to say that, and mean it. Three years passed by and it feels like I had only once just blinked my eyes. And now, after having opened them, I see differently. The haram is more colorful, more pure, more serene, more calming and restful. And Sayyida... She's been the same of course. But I feel her existence more vividly. Feels like I know her now. Or she knows me. Not because of the eventual familiarity with that place or frequent visitations. But because of acceptance.

Sometimes just as you lift the curtain and see her shrine, tears flow. Sometimes, nothing happens and eventually tears flow. And sometimes you lower your head and say 'as salaam alaikum', wait at the door, and just smile. A real smile. Because you know, with conviction, that she's smiling back at you.